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Hey Folks and Flyass Bitches, Check out the great animated short while I swear about my Shrink's incompetence.
[link]
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Dark comedy is the noctious sensation you get when you laugh at something that to the normal person would be immature and wrong, for example laughing at a tradgedy. Dark or Black comedy was created many years ago in the fictional land of Greece, the theeater then was strictly a community thing wherein normal folks would particpate, in fact the church did not like this at all and Labeled them to be Devils ( The Church ) but this did not matter for the people loved the " Festivites ", and they'd put on quite a show as well. There was originaly two forms of play that was acted out, one was of comedy wherein absurdity and mundane observations wereembraced with great joy by emotion. on an interesting note, other than the written form of communication and accounting The plague of laughter is what seperates us from the beasts with exception of the coyote,hyena, and the Polish like my fore fathers. However to the loathly animals there is no way of truly grasping emotion like the plague of heinous laughter which does at times clinch us. It's easy to get addicted to the contaminate because it is contagious---------the lack of it sometimes leads toward the other form of performance, the Tradgedy, yes that which holds the painful or morbid interest of life. Suffering death and the what not. Lovely comical things such as Disease, Murder, Malice, Masochism, Gloom of living before you, regret of not stopping it behind. The rib tickler of another man's peril or Hell planetly demise. Most folk dug this style for the emotional Rhythms of FEAR's chemical rush or interest in a state of shire suspense. All was balance, then one day a slight oddity did indeed happen, someone at some point in time began to chuckle or snicker during a dramatic tear wrenching tragedy, people had to turn their heads and mumble cruel words of miscontent. Someone actually found humour in a Horrible misfortune; " cLEARLY THEY ARE SICKENED! ", was the fake declaration made! Then that shit began to spread like wild fire on cocaine...All Hell broke loose aand everyone started laughing at perverted terrors ( Even though a few of them were actually funny. ) The Barrier was abolished and the line lost forever, the two blended together and became something entirely new! Babies were run over by carriages for bets, fire consumed all the water fountains, Shit turned to gold, weird shit began to happen at that moment. There was screaming not to be had as Hysteria of wickedness replaced it, it was an outbreak of a glorious thing. Before you knew it there was a motley roundup of every Known Trickster deity and demi-god...all leads were to coyote who had fire shoved in his mouth at the time. He was all like, " No way kokopelli fucking did that shit. " so poor kokopelli was put to the threats pretty intensely, He did not speak when the Authority deity asked him about the birth of the black comedy's chaotic results...Poor kokopelli just began swinging his head playing that fuck damned horn of his until he was grabbed by the wavy hair and slammed repeatedly a crossed the table until his hand was forced to sign a confessional and that's why they castrated him ( Altough we already touched base on this story before. ) Meanwhile Greece is being consumed by destruction and there's a sinful laughter everywhere to be heard because the birth of the Dark Comedy is truly fucking crazy.

Comedy has got to be the hardest human interest study of all time....when we as a wise species Iced the dodo's off maybe it was because the fuckers laughed at shit for no apparent reasons.

Knock Knock,
Who's there?
A Convicted Pedophile,
A Convicted Pedophile who?
A Convicted pedophile here to take your underage teen daughter out to a lovely four star restaurant where I shall continuously rape her inbetween courses then as an encore I'll permantly facialy like disfigure her face with a lanoleum knife I whimsically happened apon during a lost map tour in Poland, where the floors were made of aluminum coated in so un-detected coating of what seems to be rancid squeeze cheese and walnut finish, and of course she'll have me back here at say three o clock, after all it is a school night and I am a responsible person.

sure some will whince, but who cares who laughs, just as long as they do. Also, Spontaneously combusting is bad if you work on an Oil refinery. More so if it's rectal like.

Maybe It's true that This life is nothing but a real joke with no topping punchline to be held, then when you die you are goining to get that punchline, but then you forget the fucking joke in the first place. So life goes on natural like for years and in the end it's down to two living people dueling it out with burning chainsaws in the sun rise....Then maybe if the Universal Deities applaud and the credits rule that everyone played themselves.........Perhaps we will get a straight to fuck damned rental sequel and the motherfucking wacky Dodo will at last have it's just so deserving Revenge.

Now Let's Play, Fuck OFF! I Appreciate everything. I am not going to Apologize for anything after this.

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Check the FCC Song Out Folks and Flyass Bitches!, [link]

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Hey Folks and Flyass Bitches, Check out the great animated short while I swear about my Shrink's incompetence.
[link]
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What the Fuck?

I thought I was the Crazy Dumbass.

I still am regardless.

next Journal: a piece on Dark Comedy.

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Check the FCC Song Out Folks and Flyass Bitches!, [link]

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Hey Folks and Flyass Bitches, Check out the great animated short while I swear about my Shrink's incompetence.
[link]
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A Bar Joke originally written on the back of a xeroxed page about goal setting.

A well shaven blond man in a brand new, expensive looking white suit is walking into a Hot Shit bar, under one arm he has a large Fire Extinguisher, under the other a well behaved, pedigreed, minature poodle that has a little pink ribbon on the top of it's poofy head.

After walking into the Bar, the Man stands and stares at the bartender. The bartender is a thin lanky man wearing all black other than the stained apron, he lifts his head and looks at the man in the white suit with a raised eyebrow while he cleans out a broken beer mug with a filthy towel all the time leaning back against the crumby yellow wall. The Man in the white suit just stands there starring at the bar keep who is now looking about the place as if to make sure he hasn't lost it. The only other patron of this fine licensed establishment is a grizzled old man who pays no attention to anything other than the glass in front of him as he sits at the bar with his back turned to the man in the white suit.

The Bartender Breaks the momentary quandry of the man's presence by dropping the broken beer mug on the ground behind the bar and the echo of it shattering triggers the unspoken answer to the man being there. The Old man of course didn't flinch at the sound of glass meeting hard wood.

Suddenly the Man in the White Suit turns away as the bar keep leans forward proping himself up by gripping the bar. He gentle like drops the poodle to the floor, The Poodle begins to arf and run around in a circular manner, the man in the white suit stands errect again and snaps his fingers at which point the poodle stands upon it's hind legs and begins to do a dance for it is apparently trained. The Bar keep at this time is very suspicious but nevertheless nods his head briefly to the side in jest, as if to say without words, " Aight. " The man in the white suit now looking down at the happy poodle as it playful dances on it's back legs with it's little mouth open. He Chuckles a little bit for a moment.

With one singular movement, The Man lifts the fire extinguisher high above his head and slams it down as if by supernatural speed and strength. In one violent manuever he smashed the poodle's head flat open on the ground, pinning it to the ground in a horrible scupture of grotesque proportions. Of course there's Poodle blood, shattered skull fragments, and tiny white and pink fluff all over the fucking place. Acrossed the floor, the bar walls , the back of the geezer's jacket, and a tiny single speck of blood on the barkeep's forehead. The Poodle's hind leg still quivering nervously like a headless chicken ( AKA: The Un-Offical Animal Mascot of the Libertarian Party. ). The Man in the White Suit Quickly Turns to face the bar keep in a single motion, wide eyed and gripping the Fire Extinguisher. The Bar Keep puts a hand to his chin and scratches his short goatee slightly nodding as if to say, " Yes, I see where you're going with this now. ".

The Old man Drinks from his Glass.

The Man in the white Suit Tears off his pants, Much to the terror of the bar tender by his expression. He Pulls the Pin out of the Fire Extinguisher with his teeth, Shoves the Noozle up his asshole, Then Clasps the trigger spraying foam in and out of his anus. He then dances around the whole place slapping his ass like he was slapping a horse's ass as the extinguisher leaves a trail of foam after him. The whole time he's dancing back and forth smacking his buttocks riding the fire extinguisher like a beaten poney, he's singing, " Camp town Races. " This continues for some time until he is out of breath, then he pauses again above the poodle's cadaver. He Wheezes, pulling the bloody noozle of the extinguisher out of his ass and dropping it to roll around on the ground. The Foam Clears and he stares back at the Expressionless Barkeep.

There's about a fifteen minute pause in which time the man in the white suit catches his breath and the bar keep refills the old timer's glass from the tap system without saying a word. Then the bar keep stares again at the Man. In exactly three and a half seconds after that, he says, " Well, I can clearly see that you are very experienced unfortunately we are not currently hiring at this point in time, Please try again. "

The Man in the white suit Castrates himself with his bare hands and screams, " I should've sang New York, New York! "

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The Moral of this Little Story:
Entirely too many people are Bitching about the MotherFucking Gas Prices.

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Check the FCC Song Out Folks and Flyass Bitches!, [link]

" That's all I remember. Now I'm Going to start drinking and if you have a problem with that, go fuck yer mother, and if she's dead, I have a shovel you can borrow."
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This one's non fiction. I have a friend who this past year has come to grips with being a solid Schizophrenia owner, Also a self hating Bisexual we suspect. Anyway he's been quite busy this year. He got detained for being and driving under the influence of cannabis which he possessed. He was thrown out of his house where he was living with his father, Which I should mention is a factor in his Illness because his father is also a Schizoid. His father believes that their neighbor, a frail one and a foot tall elderly women, Is working with a rogue sect of politically employed agents and has been pumping poison into their house for monthes. One night his father was arrested for smashing the old lady's front windows up with a bat and calling her out, Allegedly when the police showed up he was deliriously explaining how she was poisoning them as he held the bat. Anyway, He got his car out of impound only to race from the police while drunk, Ditch it in the forest about three feet away from his Aunt's house where he was now leaving. They knocked on the door until he answered pretending to be angry at then for waking him up and still wearing muddy boots from running through the woods. Before his upcoming courtdate he was then living with his aunt. One night he decided to have a few ounces out of a whiskey bottle up stairs. About five minutes later he came down the steps naked with an errection still gripping the bottle, This is when he proceedes to sit on his Aunt 's Lap and forcibly shoves his tongue down her throat. ASfter his uncle slams him to the ground he attempts to fight him off while screaming something like, " Back off She's my Whore!" They had him committed, where he claims it differently, He said, " I spent a lot of time watching TV and reading,But Those Nazis had other plans for me. "
So he gets out, They of course proclaimed him a bisexual, Potentially Homicidal, Schizophrenic. Now he Is angry because they told him he was gay. So now he's been Touching men's nipples in our bars and laughing. And A friend of Mine just told me he was accused of but not found guilty of assualting a gay man in his car, Which at the time was parked in a gaybar parking lot. I personally can picture him there with his arms crossed standing quietly with an angry look on his face as several fruits dance around him to crazy techno music before the savage attack. Then He told me ( Because I didn't believe him. ) That he actually saw blood stains in the backseat of his car. After asking him about the blood stains, this Homosexual Schizoid said, " Oh yeah. I had a nose bleed one day. " I say God speed you Schizoid who's life at this point is a prologue to a double homicide and a suicide.

" I Define Insanity more so as wiping the mud off of your shoes before leaving a house when it's raining, also you're dressed like a clown and have an axe. "

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Not all Jokes Are Funny.

But Abortion is Totally Awesome!
Fuck Damn Hooray for Abortion!
Hooray, Pull'em Out Pull'em out, GOOOOO Abortion!!!!!!!!!

Check the FCC Song Out Folks and Flyass Bitches!, [link]

Eight Facts about Me That No living beast is aware of :

1. I have a rare Heavy Indurtrial styled recording of the Laverne and Shirley Theme song Performed by a former underground punk rock band called, " Channel XXX." Who laughed at my suggestion enough to actually play it.
2. I have at one time masterbated to a National Geograhic photo of a Kangaroo.
3. Although It's been a while , I actually like to Quote, Eat Out.
4. I am Both Agnostic and an active Satanist who doesn't believe in the Existance of such a deity.
5. I'm going to do my artwork and get an income from it or My Death will be public and I'll be the one who calls the newscrews to air it.
6. I have Masterbated to Fantasies of female Cartoon Characters, Babs Bunny keyly.
7. I am Leaving the country after Hiliary Clinton is voted into Presidentcy because the Clintons are in the same bed as the Bush Bringers of Shame.
8. I am mildly trained in Jeet Kwan Do.

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Aye, Some Horrid Dope fiend Friend has Finally Tagged me, I shalt Seek Revenge By the Souls of all dead squirrel breeders who also declared a one person war against the nation of Sweden:

The Pre-mentioned Good natured, Charming, well scented, Jerkass Jerkwad Jabroni whom Tagged Yours truly:

[link]

If you Were Viciously Assualted by me Tagging you, ( Sorry Buddy. ) Here's the rules Given to me from Handstanding ( A Decent being Supernaturally charged by forces men should not know which give this one the lustful rage toward small children. )

The rules ( If you were Tagged. ) :
1. Post these rules
2. Each person tagged must post 8 random facts about themselves
3. Tags should write a journal/ blog of these facts
4. At the end of the post 8 more persons are tagged and named
5. Go to their page and leave a comment telling them they're tagged
6. Go perform Cunninglingus or suck off a family member ( But Not you, You alone don't have to. )
7. Tell Handstanding what you think about being tagged, because I merely a broken vessel
8. Shoot your Local Congressman
9. prepare for a future life walking the streets of Cuba to distribute fliers which reviel the pros of capitalism.

The Victims of my Tagging Antics ( All Talented in their own right. ):

[link]

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Not all Jokes Are Funny.

But Abortion is Totally Awesome!
Fuck Damn Hooray for Abortion!
Hooray, Pull'em Out Pull'em out, GOOOOO Abortion!!!!!!!!!

Check the FCC Song Out Folks and Flyass Bitches!, [link]